For the Love

 

Everyone Has That Favorite Artist. For me, no one came closer than Tupac Shakur. When I first saw him in Juice I was like "Fuck Bishop" lol, and "Brenda's gotta baby" was just too depressing for me as a 12 year old. I moved to Kansas in 1994 and got into ordering music thru BMG music group. "STRICKLY FOR MY NIGGAZ" was like an awakening for me. If you haven't heard this album I suggest you get it. The rest is history and now my favorite artist is an icon and loved by all, and what was once a at time exclusive preference, it is now so clique to say you love 2pac.

I miss him daily, and often at times put myself thru the possibilities of what would be now if he where still alive. Still I understand that his premature death has fulfilled a legacy that he often wished for himself.

This Month I'll be 30. THIRTY!! WoW!! Ya know?
Funny how these things happen. Oh and not surprisingly I rap. I mean who doesn't rap. LOL, no but I really rap, like I sound good, I'm GOOD at this. But music has changed so much and I'm feeling like a relic of a time lost though everyone tells me how dope I am, the hustle of it all just isn't what I thought it would be. THE MARKET IS FLOODED. It's cool though be cause I have a new favorite artist now, a new exclusive preference. ME! Adullessence. And he is dope. You don't believe me?!
www.myspace.com/lessence
check it out, and tell me I'm not gonna be alright.
I love writing, and I'm gonna take this shit to my grave, may God bless you, as he has blessed me.
Word up.

She's Mine

 

So anyway I was chilling wit this Very Attractive female the other day. And I couldn't help but mentioning a topic that happen to be on my mind. Now I won't front, I've had my share of pretty women from time to time, but usually when you step to these women they've heard so much shit since they were twelve it's like they're always on "protected by viper, stand back" mode. Fellas know what I'm talking about.

Anyway I said the right things this time and opened her up to the kind of conversation I tend to enjoy. Topic of the day? "Isn't it funny how men can see you in the same light that they see a car, new kicks, even jewelry?" A (Status Quo) I'm sure it's nothing new, but most of the time women are seen as objects to be obtained. Like nice clothing, nice cars, Money. You get the picture. I've seldom met a woman who looked at men in that fashion. Not to say that as a whole they don't. Even I've found myself dealing with women who were no good simply to get off on being seen with them in public. It's shallow, but it happens. It's funny what you put up with from someone who's easy on the eyes, lol.
(side note) it's been said,
"A woman's life is love, a man's love is life."

I'm getting older though. And in my age I've come to take more notice of qualities that physical appearance can't hold up to. Quailities like character, ambition, work ethic, and my favorite....social skills. Some women get by on looks so much, it's the only quality they have. Don't get my wrong though people, it's always fun to sleep with really pretty women, but as time has went by a priority I've always known takes president. In the end we are all just looking for a best friend that we can kick it with and fuck, lol. Good Times.

yall be cool.

The Comedian

 

Thank you Bernie Mac.
For making me laugh since I was like 12 years old. I just wanted to take the time on this day of your death to appreciate you as I'm sure we all have, for giving us joy in our lives. 50 years is not an idea length of time most of us want here. Still, I'd like to take the time to celebrate your 50 years, because I just know you enjoyed them. God bless you brother. And God bless your family. Because at the end of the day, we all adored you for how much you reminded us of ourselves, and our families. God bless.

The Paradox

 

My ambition.

Production? Check. Lyrics? Check. Resources, associates, fans? Check.............I'm good?
Would you all like to know the paradox of my life?
I've almost always been able to accomplish my goals. Yet with every success and hurdle leaped, I loose out on those in my personal life. Some thru neglect on my part, and others I have no fucking idea. But I'm doing good right. Lately I've been trying to figure out why I can't leave more of an impression in peoples lives, especially those I've considered quite close to me. LOL, I've realized recently that most women actually use ME. Either for sex or conversation. I know that my previous post confused alot of people, I apologize. Sometimes the future frightens me and I needed to vent. The storm I spoke of has arrived and I intend to weather it, because that's what I do. LOL, I've been praying for a wife lately. I guess I'm growing up or something. To those who know me this would be surprising, I was never one for such talk just a few years ago. Funny how change comes. I have all I've ever really wanted except someone to share it all with, and someone who will be if it all blows away. But people blow away too, and I know people come and go. I just need ONE who will stick around, and who I want around for that matter. Thus far that as been asking too much of life. I want my swag back though. Part of me still doesn't wanna give a fuck and have poeple hate me for it. I felt stronger then. Just maybe I can have someone that I can be against the world with for a change. I do my victory dances alone at the moment. Damn I'm still ranting. Anyway, NO I'm not doing good, and YES I'm doing better than ever. I'm not ungrateful. I just had people around me who didn't really give a fuck about me, and people wonder why I'm such a hard ass, you need thick skin for this shit. I'm gonna rant and vent until my frustration passes.
Because I haven't forgotten that I write this blog mostly for me and I shall continue to. So for those who are still reading, stick around. As I've said before, I'll smile again. Be cool yall. Pray for a Man.

Bleeding Hope "The Rant"

 


Success is all around me. My home, my cars, certain love interests, money and friends.
Not to mention the music. The music which has taken me so long so get heard by those who would listen, and get me away from this simple happy life.
I left the studio yesterday and heard what is to come with a jubilation I've never known before hearing my own voice to songs I wrote that take on a life of thier own. I'm reaching the summit of a climb that has taken so long and I thank God and Jesus that from this high position I've been placed upon, I can watch the dawn.
Still....something wicked this way comes. A new calling that has frieghtened me I must admit. Unknownling I've chosen a path that cannot be retraced so I must pray for strength. In this life what else is there to do?

Did I mention I hate chain letters.

Damn I feel so abandoned and my faith in my fellow kind is fleeting with the days. Not saying I'm much better. We all seem so selfish. Why so insightful Anthony, why? Sometimes I wish I was ignorant, happy with what is put before me, and believed in Santa Claus. So tired, so confused, so focused, and so hopless. I just wanna be ready to die. Not meaning that I want to or that I don't. I just don't wanna give a fuck. My favorite word is Serenity.
I need that. I'm cold. My heart is broken and my health fades with my lack of optimism. I don't want advice, I just want it to go away. Or maybe I just need help.
Holla.