Great Full

New Crew, New Shoes, New Cars, New Ways to Move.

I like my new friends, and I'm not gonna even say "so far", I'm just gonna take it like it is right now. It may be gay so say but hey, "they really make me happy." I've met and communicated with those who would like to see me fall, and sometimes that weighs on me heavily, but right now with things being good I try not to let negative people get me down. I'm trying to enjoy the moment. I'm so focused on enjoying a life that was so hard and desperate just ten years ago that by any means I simply disconnect any one or anything that would ruin the eye of the storm that I'm in right now.

Life is short or rather is can be very short. I thought about this alot after my motorcycle accident(news update by the way I AM riding again.....slower though lol.) I take time to smell the roses, let somethings go, this would probably be a good time for anyone I've ever had a problem with to make good with me. It's like right after I got up off that road, something clicked in my head and said every second that passes from this moment would have passed without you, and left you where you lay. I almost cried probably six times that day and the day after, but no tears really came, just moments of intense emotion. At the same time I must admit that alot of the crazy things I did on my bike were because part of me wanted to die, not from depression or anything like that. I just didn't want to live to see the possible downfall that some of you want to come upon me. I didn't want to reap what I'd sowed, whatever that may be in the future. I didn't want to grow old. Yet and still I wake up every morning and I'm here. Theres so much more to that than just saying it. Two others died on thier bikes after my accident, a 19 year old named Leo, and a 24 year old named Robbie. And I was going faster than them when I took my spill, I wonder what that means sometimes. Maybe shit just happens. I know you people don't have great attention spans for long blog posts so I'm gonnna end it here with. I'm sorry for what ever I may have done to any of you. I'm just taking things as they come. You may not believe me but I cherish/cherished the presence of you all in my life and if I could I would take back the time to make things right.
Yall be cool.

Present Government Speaks!!!

And what do we say?

There is only one woman who can even entertain the notion of me considering to settling down with her. And she shall remain nameless. Present government wants nothing to do with a relationship otherwise.
What sparked this topic might I add. A few weeks ago I ran into this female I knew back when I was acting like a girl, ya know wanting desperately to be a part of something(SPECIAL) lol, I crack me up.
Anyway we fucked, one time I pushed it to happen I'll be honest but at the time she wanted it too. So years go by and I mean like 5 or 6 years go by and by chance (topeka) I run into her at a club. These days I'm picky as hell and I get bored easily and so on, those who know me now understand what I'm getting at. Still I'm happy to see her mainly because I'm a very nostalgic person. I ask for her number she gives it and I give her mine, tell her we should get together sometime for old times sake, have some dinner or something I'm not being as hard on her as I usually am mainly because of her link to the past. Now I Don't think that she wants to hook up with me by any means and I say this because I'll be damned if she didn't kinda give me the cold shoulder just days later so I guess all that at the club was Hollywood talk. Thing is I'm so fucking honest these days to women, sometimes painfully. And I get shit from that from time to time. But I mean shit this has happen before one way or another. I mean why couldn't she have just been like, " nigga please I don't even really wanna talk to you", or just said no. Then I could just write a post about how fucked up that was. No instead it has to be drawn out and I have to figure that shit out, which isn't cool if you ask me. Same goes for the other way around, I tell a female "I don't want no girl friend, I just wanna be friends. " She says ok. But she lying cause 2 weeks and sometimes 2 days lata she trying make it more than it is, and I'm suppose to feel bad or like I have commitment problems cause I aint with her progarm. You women kill me. Then you actually got the nerve to say there ain't no good men. Maybe you just ain't a good woman. What you are is what you get, and what you get is what you really looking for. I'll be the first to admit that I've pulled more than my share of good women. All of them in college, or have they own homes and good jobs. I fucked it up cause I just aint ready to settle right now.
But I'm getting there, I mean I aint getting no younger.
HOLLa!!