Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Spaced Out


So. What have I been up to these days???
Absolutely NOTHING. I work, sleep, and eat. It's like I'm on auto pilot. Constantly missing Heather and looking forward to our future together. Sounds corny?? Maybe it does. So what. Right?? It's been a journey since I first started writing this blog. I've definitely had my ups and downs as far as life goes. Women have come and gone, MONEY, lol has come and gone. The last ten years and everything in them has come and gone.
And now I seek the calm.
Calm before the new year/decade of what will be a constant. Beginning with Heather.

So for now I've just been taking a break, reading and clearing my mind. Finding serenity is a daily quest so I stop and appreciate even the simplest things in life. Hell just the other day i sat and meditated to the heat vent blowing in my room. I think about the walls, the direction I'm facing, and enjoy the feeling of deep breaths and a quiet mind. No revelation, no new understanding, just leaving things as they are and have been presented to me, but taking the time to notice them in a new light that has always been there.
Ya know?

I don't want anymore drama. I intend to move forward in as constant a true manner as I possibly can. I don't wanna deal with anyone who deals with "shit" in general or who can even bring it into my life. I need to relax so badly. And that is all I want.
Haha, I'm even gonna watch Saturday morning cartoons again! (Well if i can get thru them, they baby kids too much these days)

So anyway that me towards the close of 2009. Just chilling and spaced out. I'm in the eye of the storm as far as I'm concerned.
Just chill till it's time to man up and pass thru the other side. I'm Focused man, and since I've gotten rid of all the dead weight I'm surround by the few I can trust.

And I believe that.

Yall be cool.