Wednesday, February 15, 2006

The Motherland....(Fuckit)

This is dedicated to all you pro black/back to africa muthafuckaz out there. As well as you white supremists.

I was born in America, as my father before me, and his father before him and so on. America is my home, my motherland. I eat from this land(for that matter so does most of the rest of this world.) I'm gonna die here one day as long as I have a say in it.
Fuck africa, it's as foreign to me as Russia.

I once had the pleasure (if you wanna call it that) of hanging out with a bunch of africans and for the most part, they don't care much for us anyway, and I could care less. I recall them saying that all we do is sing and play basketball. Also a comment was made that we don't take advantage of the opportunities given in this country. You come over and read all them books with a free education, and don't know nothing about Jim Crow. So I need to get all I can out of my country and you live next to a diamond mine.
Black roots huh, my black roots began on a boat trip after some african sold one of my ancestors to the white man. And after Nate Turner, MLK, and Malcolm X, you radical niggaz telling me I should just say fuck them that (among others) got they ass whipped or killed just to say "man we've come so far here, but ya know what? Fuck'em I'm just gonna go back to Africa."
Yeah right.
On the real though, day to day I don't have a problem with africans, I'm not even thinkin much about them. I just feel like they the next best thing black americans been trying to look up to next to the wihite man, and that ain't cool. We need to focus on our heritage here, cause we ain't never gonna be africans again, we been thru too much for that kind of thinking. I ain't never been to africa, and I don't plan on going anytime soon. Been too busy anyway tryna figure out whats going on with us here in America, my country, my home.
Word up.

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Thursday, February 09, 2006

ANGER!!!

My aunt asked me about a week ago why am I so angry. And I've decided to ask myself that question tonite. It is my hope that one day I'll look a back on these writings and realize it was all in my mind.

But that day hasn't come yet. While these days I know it's simply ego. I get upset with people when they don't realize the magnificence of a person like me kind of like an artist would feel insulted if no one took notice of his most recent materpiece.

As a child I still remember the day they brought my little sister home from the hospital after being born, I was no longer the baby, and she got her ass whipped for 9 years because of it. I hated my father for not being more of a father. Hated my mother for the bond her and my sister shared. And hated my brother for being such a great guy. Maybe hate is a strong word, lets just say I carried this big chip on my shoulder. I've always got upset when women didn't show me the attention that I felt I deserved or didn't take the time to get to know me. Disliked family for not making me feel like I was family. Angry at times with God for even being, and angry with my self for thinking the way I do.

If I died tomorrow I know they would move on. My mother would shed her tears of course, I think dad would, I know the brother and sister would. I don't know who would get my stuff or what they would do with it, but I'm sure it wouldn't be to my liking regardless of any Will I may decide to write as if I should care anyway. My son has a family and i know they would take care of him, I mean shit I know my family wouldn't. I'm ranting now I know. I'm sure this is all just me coming of age and realizing that in all actuality none of this really matters. Lives are trivial aswell as the affairs I mean really how much will any of it matter 100 years from now. Bleek I know but fuckit. These things anger me, but most of all I think what angers me is I see that we don't take the time to notice or get to know one another because we overlook the fact that we are brief, one of a kind, miracles...and we don't even care. Whats fuckin wit dat? Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

The Black Ocean


Due to some lack of support. (Typical click attitudes) Aswell as a need to move to other topics and i've put them off much to long now. I've decided to end my tribute to Stuart with word delivered by the man himself in a poem he wrote supplied by his closest friend, Gary.

Voice OF the BLACK Ocean

From darkness we came
and TO darkness WE return
THIS IS NOT the voice of deSPair

ALL of our lyrics
ALL of our paintings
ALL of our poetry,
each OF our works

ride THE waves of the BLACK OCEAN
we DO not know
WE DO not understand
WE are not wise

Born FROM the oblivious space
every art attempts to encapsulate
We are the goal OF science
the aim OF religion.


The Original DEEp THINker(We will forever miss you little man.) Posted by Picasa